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Beef Goes AWOL All Over Captain America 2's BlockbusTurd Ass

Captain America 2

There was once a time when I wanted to see super hero movies. Batman was awesome in the 80s and 90s but Dark Knight is bland. Superman kicked ass in the 80s and hasn't been the same since.

X-men had and awesome cartoon in the 90s. Arcade, 8 and 16 bit video games were awesome and breathed new life into comic books. I played through the early 90s Avengers arcade game before I went to see Avengers in the theatre and i had a lot more fun playing the arcade game over again for the millionth time than I had seeing the film for the first.

I liked the first Captain America movie even though it failed at capturing the humor of the 2000s era fantastic four movies despite hiring Chris Evans. This sequel however, is like a weak tea made for TV spin-off sequel to the avengers, not a true sequel to the original movie.

It stars Samuel Jackson and Scarlett Johanson as much as it does Chris Evans.

It goes off on a subplot about Sammy gettin' whacked by hydra which could have easily been put in the second avengers movie if not axed entirely, either way, the lengthy action scene and the boring dramatic hospital scene which followed are both very tacked on and non-sequitur.

Time that should have been spent establishing Sam Wilson's Falcon was wasted on the vapid and useless Scarelett Johanson who is clearly out of her element in the company of Robert Downey Jr, Chris Evans, Chris Heimsworth, Mark Ruffalo, Sameul Jackson and Jeremy Renner.

You could bounce more jokes off of a wall, and she simply isn't funny or charismatic in any role frankly. She is sort of like the backstreet boys of actors. Did I like anything about this BlockbusTurd?

I liked what little Falcon time was allotted by it's trainwreckish editing precess and I like some of the cast. I like the retro supercomputer brain bad guy and found Him a lot more interesting than Doki Doki Loki. Some of the action was sort of interesting almost. Meh, at least the Thor movies were good.

—Beef and Mac, Movie Cops | @RealBucketBros | Email

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